I often times think about who I would be if I were not a Christian. Previously I wrote about how my views would be affected by the belief that God does not exist. I am going to write again on that subject. In what follows, I want you to know that I am being completely honest. Not a bit of what I tell you is exaggerated or for shock effect.
The other day I was at a restaurant. A very attractive woman walked into the restaurant. I told myself to respect the beauty of that woman but avert my eyes and mind and to place them elsewhere. Immediately this thought came into my head: “Why did I just decide to stop myself from having a very pleasurable moment?”
What I realized is that the primary reason I stopped myself was because of the fact that I am a Christian. When I say “Christian”, I do not mean someone who checks the box “Christian” simply because they do not know what else they would be or because they believe in God or went to church when they were younger and every now and then as an adult. I mean someone who recognizes themselves as a sinner, that God loves them even so, that Christ came to make a way for people to have a right relationship with God, who every day loves and does his best to follow God, and when he fails at that he turns to God asking forgiveness and a desire to be more like Christ. I know that is a lot when defining a Christian, but that really is what a Christian is. A Christian is not someone who simply believes in God. A Christian is someone who actively follows Christ in belief, repentance, and obedience, all motivated by love for God.
After I realized that the primary reason I stopped looking and thinking about the very attractive woman was because I was a Christian, I got to thinking. I asked myself, “What if I were not a Christian? What would I have done?” I then started wondering about the many other things I would do if I were not a Christian. I decided to write a blog about it.
Why did I decide to write a blog about it? Because I believe that virtually no one else would say what I am going to be honest enough to say. I know and interact with a number of friends who try to convince me and others that God does not exist. I inform these friends that if I were an atheist, I would completely change who I am because my worldview is such a large part in making me who I am. So the following is just a few ways I would be different if I were not a Christian.
If you are a Christian reading this, then you are going to have to forgive me. I am going to be speaking as an atheist, so do not be surprised to hear me say things I would never normally say … starting … right … now.
The Hot Girl
First, I would not have averted my eyes and mind from the hot girl in the restaurant. I would have enjoyed the view. I would have done more than that though. I would have talked to her to enjoy the moment for as long as I could. After all, life is simply the make up of a bunch of moments. Why not make the good moments last? Who knows how long we could have made that moment last? We both did not seem to have much on our plates for the day. Maybe we could have made a day out of it … and probably a night out of it.
Almost all my life I have tried to avert my eyes and mind from sexual thoughts that are outside a marriage relationship. Do you have any fucking idea how hard that is? (Come on. Even if you do not appreciate the f-bomb, you have got to admit that was perfectly placed.) The thing is that I did a relatively decent job of that too. There were a number of girls that I kept my hands off or never even approached for the sake of following Christ. What the fuck did I do to myself? I could have had a lot of fun. I saved myself for marriage. Why the fuck did I do that?
But hey, my younger life is not over yet. I am still capable of finding attractive women who entertain the thoughts I entertain. Why am I keeping myself from this enjoyment? I know you are going to bring up the fact that I am married, but that is a minor problem. There are many people with open marriages. Why can I not have one? If my wife does not want one, well, that is not a problem that a lawyer and a little slip of paper cannot resolve. I know that sounds heartless, but why would I keep my wife locked into a relationship that she does not want? That is heartless. It would be better for her if I just let her go free to find someone who desires the kind of relationship she desires. It is also wrong of me to lie to myself all the time saying that I do not want to have sex with other hot women. I fucking do. Why torture myself and keep that bottled up my whole life?
I am expecting a kid pretty soon. The other day I was thinking about what a baby is. From a naturalistic perspective, the baby is nothing more than the physical byproduct of my sexual urges. That is it. There is nothing special about the baby. There is no miracle, nothing admirable. This baby could have resulted if I had just hooked up with a girl for one night in a furry of fucking, or if I had a committed monogamous marital relationship. Same result. The baby is simply the physical byproduct of my sexual urges. Welcome to the world, offspring of sex.
The Christian me was pretty frugal. He was frugal because he wanted to save his money so he could help people who needed it. But why the fuck do that now that I do not believe in God? Why not spend the money that I get on me? Sure I will spend money on my friends, but that is because I know they will eventually help me. Why the fuck would I give to some bum on the street who is too lazy and hooked on drugs or alcohol to do what he knows he needs to do to get a job? (By the way, any bum can get a job. Admittedly it takes work, but it can happen if they really want it. Also, a lot of those people really are content with begging for money. I had a friend who one time told a beggar that she could get her a job for over $10/hr. The beggar refused saying, “I make more money doing this.” That is not an uncommon occurrence.)
Thinking of all the money I am going to have since I do not tithe at a church or give to other charities, holy shit I am going to have some fun. I know I could get a bunch of fun people with me to enjoy all this together … and fuck will we have fun.
Who else wants to have a fuck load of fun? You know how to contact me. Let’s do this. Do not let society pressure you into suppressing your real desires. Do not let the society that has no right to tell you what you can or cannot do constrain your life. You only live once. Live it well. Stop allowing yourself to be restricted by societal norms. Break free from normal thinking. Think like kings and queens. We are the apex of evolution. Let us enjoy the mountain top.
Did you notice the picture associated with this post? Did you notice the symbol above the wording? That symbol is used by atheists to represent atheism. Notice what the wording says? Well, fuck yeah. Let us enjoy life. Stop allowing yourself to be hindered by other belief systems’ insistence on moral standards. And by the way, an atheist that has a moral agenda for your life is another’s belief system. Why in the world would you shackle yourself to moral standards when we have freed ourselves from them?
Are You Judging Me?
What? Are you judging me? What the fuck gives you the right to judge me? Seriously. Answer me. Why the fuck do you think you have a right to judge me right now? I know you may think your moral compass is better than mine, but where is North in regards to morality? I mean it. Explain to me why I should live to your moral standards. Go ahead. I have challenged people before to give me a reason to live according to their standards. Not surprisingly no one took me up on the challenge.
Are you really going to tell me that we should just be good for goodness’ sake? Shut the fuck up. What is good? Biological evolution tells me that self-preservation is good. Indeed, that is the main reason for pretty much every action we do. Even actions that seem to be altruistic are actually accomplished because they indirectly benefit the self. So I am doing good. I am self-preserving.
If I scratch someone’s back, it is because I fully expect them to scratch mine. Is it not right for me to expect that? If you are not going to scratch my back, then fuck off. I can find plenty of people who will scratch my back. I do not need you to do it for me. There are plenty of people like me. You may be stranded on your own little island thinking that everyone thinks like you, but I have a news flash for you Walter Cronkite, not everyone’s like you, bruh.
There is no North in morality. Morality is simply whatever one person concludes in his own mind. Just because you prefer a certain strain of morality does not mean that I should prefer yours. Nothing in the universe dictates for us an absolute moral guideline. Not nature or society. Society may make up moral rules for us to follow, but that does not mean that they are what we should do; they are only what society prefers for us to do. I for one am not going to let myself get tied down by someone else’s demands on my life. If I did that, I would basically be submitting myself to a type of god – the god of society. Well, I just broke free from a life of living under a theos, I will not submit myself to that kind of slavery again.
If you expect me to live to your moral standards, you had better give me a really good reason as to why I should. The “Why” behind every action is the most important part of an action. The why is what drives an action. The problem is that I can come up with a different “why” than your “why”, and depending on the goal, my “why” may be better than your “why”.
With my new atheistic naturalistic approach to life, I am now free of any moral bindings that others would like to place on me. I do not have to do what is good by Christian standards. Shit, I do not have to do good by any standards. I just know that I want to enjoy this one life I have. I will make plenty of friends who see life the same way I do. We will enjoy life.
And now we switch gears to me being a Christian …
What I said about the why being the most important part of an action is true. We humans are not solely creatures of nature without choice. We can overcome natural instinct and create our own reasoning for actions. As a Christian, I overcome my sinful instinct to follow the plan that God has for me. Instead of giving into natural urges, I listen to the Spirit of God as He gives me reasons to live life according to God’s will.
Why do I live as God wills? Because God has created me and as Creator He knows what is best for me. Because His standards keep being proved over and over again that they are what benefits individuals and societies the most. Because He loves me even when I am terribly sinful and patiently calls me to repentance. Because while performing actions like self-sacrifice that will not lead to any benefit in this temporal life, God sees the actions and will reward them in eternity. I do not just live once. I live for eternity.
Without God there is no reason to live with empathy, compassion, etc. when it does not benefit you to live that way. With God, there is always a reason to live with empathy, compassion, etc. even when it does not seem to bring any direct benefit to you.
If there were no God, I would be a completely different person. The only reason I am who I am is because of Christ. This is true for a many other good amount of people. Indeed, many people who do not believe in God still hold to a strong morality because of Christianity’s work over the last millennia. If Christianity did not exist, morality as we know it would be completely different.
I have heard many people say, “If you need God to be good, then you are not good”, or, “I do not need God to be good.” First off, those statements are incredibly self-righteous. Secondly, I completely admit that one can have strong morals even without believing in God. However, one cannot justify one’s moral standards without God. If there is no God, then no one is tied to another’s conception of morality. The statement “If you need God to be good …” assumes that there is a standard of what “goodness” is. Well, there is no such standard without God. Goodness is defined differently by each individual. There is no reason for one individual to accept another individual’s definition of what good is.
So if you really want to convert me to atheism, then you are asking for a new me to emerge. Without God you cannot tell me I am wrong to express myself in the way I have described who I would be. You can only say you do not prefer it. Preference is what you really describe when describing morality from an atheistic perspective, not right and wrong.
I honestly am so glad that I have a reason to live the way I do. A number of people live reason-less. They just live out their lives thinking they are doing what they should do. How purposeless. That kind of vacuum is dangerous. While right now the world may be accepting of morality, that will change. With everything there is a season. Some generation is going to rise up and be awakened to the fact that we are unnecessarily shackling ourselves to the baseless moral decrees of society.
Please do not hate me for who I am not. Remember, I am not the atheist who spoke in this blog. In fact, I am the person who rejects that person every waking moment of my life. I had one friend disavow me for who I am not when I told her what I would be if I were an atheist. That is very unfair. Please do not be unfair. I am just trying to be honest.